Auditory Perceptual Problems – My Story
Thursday, November 13th, 2003
© 2003 Dale Susan Brown
I am writing this article with the hope that readers will understand that each of us is different. What works for one does not work for all. Yet, sharing is helpful, and I hope this material starts someone thinking. I am emphasizing auditory perception here because these difficulties are not very often discussed. The experience of finding out about my auditory perceptual problems, after knowing about the rest of my learning disabilities, is all too typical. This is my story.
I sat across from the counselor. “Tina told me that I might have auditory perceptual problems,” I told her. “She said that you’d give me a test.”
The counselor nodded. She put a large pad with four pictures in front of me and explained that she would play a tape that would say words. I was to point to the picture of the word. The pictures looked childish, and it seemed a bit embarrassing. She turned on the tape recorder. The test seemed easy as I pointed to picture after picture. She took it away and worked on scoring it, while I remembered what brought me there.
I had spent three months working in a factory. The job was tough for me, and I left with a feeling of failure. Once, my supervisor scolded me because she said, “Strip eight wires”, but I had heard eighty. I then realized that something was wrong and began to keep track of my mistakes. To my surprise, most of them involved hearing. So I visited a counselor named Tina. She listened to my story and asked me some questions. I answered all of them, “Yes.” She stated that I might have auditory sequencing problems, which meant hearing sounds out of order. She sent me to another counselor named Mary who would test me.
Mary’s voice pulled me away from my memories.
“Dale,” she said. “I’ve been through your scores twice, and frankly, you’ve done poorly. You have scored in the lowest ten percentile.
I felt strange; happy, upset, and relieved all at once.
“Well, let’s make sure that I was pointing to the right pictures,” I said. (I also had visual perceptual problems.) It turned out that at one point, I had heard the word “fair” correctly, but pointed to a fair woman, rather than to a picture of a “fair” which I had interpreted as a tent. Still, that didn’t affect my score.
“Well, how do you feel about it?” asked the counselor.
“At the moment, I’m not feeling anything,” I replied.
“Well, if you ever want to talk about it, you can make an appointment.”
“OK, I’m sorry I’m not into talking right now. I guess I have a lot to think about it, so that’s what I would like to do… think.”
I left the office, walked out the door and down the hall. I was too involved in my own thoughts to look around. Memories tumbled through my mind…fighting with my Mom, because I was waiting for her at the wrong time…organizing a bus trip and telling the students to return at 4:30 when the bus driver told me he’d be back at 5:30… asking the teacher a question and hearing him say, “Dale, I just covered that.” …watching a movie and not being able to follow the plot.
Intellectually, I was satisfied with the diagnosis, but emotionally, it was a lot to absorb. I knew I saw incorrectly, was extremely clumsy, lacked a sense of direction, and had to consciously control my restlessness. But I thought my hearing was safe.
I was depressed, full of self-pity, and angry for weeks. “I can’t trust any of my senses,” I kept thinking. No wonder I always stared. My “staring” was an effort read people’s lips as they spoke. When in a group, I always felt separate and alien, straining to keep up. My image of myself was a person who was insensitive, untactful, and rude. Now it was clear that if my hearing wasn’t right, my responses would not be right either.
For the first few months after the diagnosis, I noticed many of my hearing errors. For example, a friend asked me to, “Go to the wall and turn on the light.” When I did it, she laughed and said, “Dale, I told you to go to the hall and turn to the right.”
I listened to various background noises and sorted them out from each other. Could I hear the silverware rattling in the cafeteria, the chairs scraping the floor, the clanking conveyer belt that took our trays to the dishwashing room, the clattering keys of the cash register, the soft bell when its drawers opened? My hearing slowly improved.
I reevaluated my “coping skills” which were clearly inefficient, since they were developed when I thought my hearing was my strongest sense. I thought about and tested better ones. Here are some that worked for me:
- Taking less notes in class since writing interfered with listening. Instead, I discussed the material with other students and my teacher. When my auditory perception improved, I listened for important facts and wrote them down.
- Asking many people to teach me something so that no one person would get impatient with me. Unfortunately, in a small college, people quickly learn secrets about one another. That embarrassment seemed preferable to demanding several hours of one person’s time.
- Asking instructors to show me what to do and then watch me do it.
- Writing down important facts. Repeating what I had to remember.
- Holding conversations with one person at a time, rather than having discussions in groups.
- Keeping background noise down. When there was noise in the hallway, I walked out of my seat and closed the classroom door. I didn’t study in my noisy dormitory room, but bought my books to empty classrooms and in the library.
As my perception strengthened, I developed subtle ways of repeating back, using my own words, adding a few of my thoughts. My favorite phrases were, “So what you are saying is” and “So, you are telling me that…. “Well, you seem to think….”
For years, after learning about my auditory perception, I coped with it and tried to remediate the disability. Some activities that improved my auditory perception were:
- Studying books on how to help children with learning disabilities and adapting these techniques to myself.
- Listening to tapes and repeating what I heard.
- Listening to my footsteps as my shoes hit the hard floor to associate the movement of my body with the sound.
- Dancing in front of a mirror.
- Listening to a conversation while chopping carrots.
- Learning to type out what someone told me on the telephone.
- Watching concerts and trying to pick out the sounds of different instruments.
- Listening to a speech and trying to tell a friend about it.
- Doggedly tracking down the reason for every mistake I made and figuring out what I heard wrong.
It became clear that my self-remediation plan was successful when I became a reporter for “Disabled USA” magazine for the President’s Committee on Employment of the Handicapped. I realized, after two years of doing it, that I had not misquoted anyone. I even developed the ability to hear to some of the “hidden messages” from people’s tones of voices well enough to make political judgments.
For my first few years on the job, I wrote down instructions to be sure they were correct. Unfortunately, taking notes during conversations to remember what was said added formality to interactions. It intimidated some people. During business lunches and receptions, where much important information is learned, taking notes is not “socially appropriate.” I worked hard to become independent of my notes.
I never became completely independent of my notes, as it is my belief that the strongest memory is weaker than the weakest pen. But, I recently was interviewing someone and took out paper and a pen.
She said, “I hope you aren’t quoting me.”
I saw she was uncomfortable, put away my notebook and smiled. I continued the interview and wrote down the facts when I returned to my office.
I hope this small story teaches the reader something about one of our disabilities that is rarely discussed – auditory perceptual problems.
Author’s Note
Adapted from article originally published in Perceptions, 1983. Dale Brown is the author of five books on disabilities and employment including “Job Hunting Tips for the So-Called Handicapped,” which she coauthored with Richard Bolles. She also authored Learning a Living, A Guide to Planning Your Career and Finding a Job for People with Learning Disabilities, Attention Deficit Disorder, and Dyslexia.
Hello,
I enjoyed reading your article. I have a daughter who has ID which include auditory perceptual problems. Your article has given me even more insight into how she must feel at times. You mentioned the “staring”. My daughter has been “accused” of this by many classmates and truthfully I never thought she could be doing that for the reason that you mentioned for yourself – trying to read people’s lips. My daughter is l5 now and in grade 9. She is in a class for students that will not graduate but will get a “finished school certificate”. In grade ll and l2 the focus will be on gaining work experience by being sent out to work 2 days a week. This is my daughter’s best year in school as she is with a smaller class group and all the students having some typing of learning disability. She nows feels she has friends who understand her and she doesn’t feel different now. She even signed up for performing arts – dance classes and I was so proud of her for what she accomplished in that class. She has many difficulties with spatial awareness and sequencing with instructions. She does not take gym classes this year because of that – too high anxiety for her.
Just wanted to let you know I enjoyed your article and it has opened my eyes even more about ways to help my child.
Thank you.
Thank you so much for your positive remarks. It means a lot to us authors when readers write.
I wish your daughter well as she chooses a career and works on becoming all that she can be.
Hello Dale,
For as long as I can remember I have always been accused of not listening or paying attention by freinds, family and teachers. In college, lectures tired me easily as I struggled through mishearing and misunderstanding. I learned to joke about it by cleverly covering up with similar sounding but funny statements. I was the kid who could not sing along but could identify a song by its beat and keep up with the melody. Long ago I read something about auditory dyslexia – I think the author was you. I just discovered this article. Hope you read this late response. Thanks for sharing your discovery with us.
Myrna
I am very glad that you realize that your problem is auditory perceptual problems. One incident that motivated me to start the self-help movement was when a women who told me that she was under the impression that people were purposely giving her the wrong time for staff meetings! She was very relieved to realize that she might simply be hearing them wrong.
I hope you continue to learn about your disabilities and find good ways to cope. Perhaps at some point, you can write an article for LD Resources.
I
I was happy to read your article. Our oldest daughter is struggling with an auditory perception problem and it is beginning to manifest itself in the 6th grade. She is frustrated and angry at school a lot due to the problem, and I think your article will us some cues that we can use to help her with her struggles.
Wow! It is great to get some positive feedback from you and to know that my article might have helped your daughter. You might want to visit http://www.ldonline.org if you get this article in the next two weeks, because there is material on auditory perceptual problems on it. I am so sorry it took me such a long time to respond- I just found your comment, but your response is deeply appreciated.
I am always amazed and curious about how people with learning disabilities, especially processing problems are able to learn to write. I am a mother of four ADHD/ADD Kids and I myself am LD and have an auditory processing problem. I was fortunate enough to have a father that could afford to pay for their education in order for them to learn successfully. They went and one more left went to a special school for LD’s and are doing well. To me it’s amazing. I often ask them for help from them, but I think it gets tiring for them or they don’t understand how my disability is much different from there’s. I mean I can’t type, I get lost driving. I get lost when watching movies. I get very distracted just from having an itch on my face. My sequencing is off and I’m a terrible reader. I don’t remember what I read unless it’s very interesting. I want to write but I have a hard time getting my thoughts down on paper. When I ask for directions about a task I have problems communicating what I mean. I graduated from high school just because they knew I tried hard even when I got straight F’s at the end of every quarter. I tried college but spent more time in my room studying and not learning so we decided I wouldn’t return. I lasted only one half a school year my first year. It took me three times just to pass my drivers test. Not the driving itself, just the written test. I moved and had to take a drivers test just recently and it took three times again and I’m 47. I am OK with this and except it but most of the majority of adults just think it’s in my head. They don’t understand. What hurts most is they don’t want or try to understand. The only people in my life that understand and know how I feel our my parents. (Mom and Dad). When they’re gone I don’t know who I’ll confide in. Or will truly understand me. I’m still trying to figure out my purpose in life. I’d like to help people but i don’t know how? I had a desire to write articles but I haven’t been successful yet. Maybe I’m dreaming. Thanks for listening. You have done well though. Congrats!
can you please post pictures of auditory dyslexia and what it does to your brain?
thankssss.
I AM RESPONDING TO ‘CATHERINE” POSTED ON SEPT.5TH, 2007.SHE STATED THAT AT 47 SHE IS STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HER PURPOSE IN LIFE. WELL MY DEAR FRIEND, MAY I SAY… YOU HAVE ALREADY FOUND IT YOU JUST DON’T KNOW HOW TO ACHIEVE IT. YOU SEE CATHERINE, EVERYTHING THAT YOU DESCRIBED IS ME!!! IF I HAD BEEN THE ONE WHO POSTED MY COMMENT FIRST YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO SEE MY STRENGTHS, MY GOALS AND MY PASSIONS. YOUR HEART WOULD HAVE HURT ONLY BREIFLY FOR THE PAIN OF SELF DOUBT THAT WE BOTH HAVE ENDURED FOR OVER 40 YEARS BUT CATHERINE, WITHOUT A SINGLE DOUBT YOU WOULD HAVE RESPONDED TO ME AS I AM TO YOU WITH ALMOST THE VERY SAME WORDS! YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE… YOU ARE A SUCCESS. LIVING LIFE IN A CONSTANT STATE OF CONFUSION AND DISORIENTATION IS NOT EASY. YOU ARE TURNING LEFT WHEN OTHERS ARE TURNING RIGHT OR SO IT SEEMS TO THEM. MAYBE LEFT IS IN FACT THE RIGHT WAY TO GO. STRANGE ISN’T IT THAT WE CAN’T READ A MAP BUT IF WE START OUT KNOWING THAT WE WILL GET “THERE” AND ARE NOT CONFUSED WITH “directions” OUR INSTINCTS TAKES US ALMOST TO THE FRONT DOOR OF OUR DESTINATION. CATHERINE, I HOPE THIS HELPS YOU TO FOLLOW YOUR BASIC INSTINCTS… THE BEST OF LIFE AWAITS YOU. FEEL FREE TO CONTACT ME… THERE REALLY IS STRENGTH IN NUMBERS AND WE ARE POWERFUL!
I just read your article and comments, and I was blessed.
My son is in the eighth grade. He was recently diagnosed with CAPD, slow processing, with dissabilities in writtn lang, math and fine motor skills.
He has struggled all his life, but 7th and 8th grade have been a nightmare for all of us. Today, We decided to stop going to the private school he attends. (teachers have basically given up). So it is a new chapter for him and I. I have been searching for a school that will be a good fit for him. His IQ is in the superior range, but I was told by the the psychologist who tewsted him that his strength, (which is his IQ)is also his downfall, Everyone thinks he is so bright,and they expect so much from him. His teachers don’t believe he has a disability and prefer to believe he is Lazy, yet he cannot take notes, or even more than one instruction at a time. He is frustrated and hates school. He is seeing a therapist because he has self esteem issues. Since he has been seeing his therapist he is happier.
He is getting Ds and Fs, but yet, he knows the a lot of the information, but finds it difficult to learn sitting down, being lectured. Can you recommend, or know of a school in Southern California that uses the kid’s learning styles in curriculum, or al least helps with Auditory Processing? They tell me he is too old for therapies.
I tried to have him tested in the second grade, but I was told by the school district he needed to be 2 years behind academically before they would test, well now he is. I wish I had listened to my maternal instincts back then.
Thank you for writing. I am so sorry that your son is having this much trouble. It is very difficult for children with auditory perception problems to learn from lectures.
I don’t know schools in Southern California, but suggest that you start with Learning Disabilities Association of California http://www.ldaca.org/
You could also try the Yellow Pages of LD OnLine ldonline.org
I hope that this information helps in some small way. The key point is that you are there for him. He is lucky you are his Mom!
Hey Catherine, I just read your September 5th letter and I think you are articulate and just wrote an expressive letter.
My suggestion- write and write and write. Write drafts and don’t worry about how they sound and then revise. Get someone to help you revise if you can’t.
Then consider sending an article to LD Resources- which is a great place for us to express ourselves and work together.
Thanks for responding to my article- people like you make it worthwhile!
I appreciated reading Dales’ story about coping with Auditory Processing problems. I was impressed with her abilities to figure out what was happening and to strenghthen her auditory capabilities.
Her solutions gave me hope that we are on the right road to help my daughter, even though she may never succeed to the degree that Dale has (the “cluster effect” of her many other disabilities make doing all that Dale did consistently very unlikely). We have tried to teach her to ask questions (“did you just say…?” and write things down but she is very resistive to these interventions and keeps insisting that she heard correctly.
Thank you Dale for writing about the effects on-the-job and for writing about your experiences. I hope my daughter will be able to benefit from your work. I know I feel better though I know the enormity of the problem. THANK YOU for WRITING. FIRST PERSON or PARENT Experiences are so helpful.
BTW, someone once sent me a story with every other word missing as an example of auditiory processing problems. I gave it to one of my child’s teachers and you could see the light bulb going off in her head as she finally “got it”. I recommend the use of such experiencial moments for all teachers(even LD ones) who get little to no training in understanding this.